This was the first night of a 20 date tour so we thought it was best to take some of the seats out of the scum bus we had hired.
We got on the road and we were all well hungry except for Billy Webb who had prepared his own meat sandwiches with optional mustard.
We stopped at the services, which is when you know tour has actually started, and filled up on crap.
A lot has changed in 10 years of touring, Crispy Cream use to be something you caught off the toilet seats at the services, how things have changed!
Mike Balls had a new game to play and was hoping to win big and estimated he was going to spend over 45 quid on his quest on this tour to win a third rate tablet with wifi capability.
Graham was so exited he had a burger too.
And was truly amazed that you can now buy a pizza on a motorway.
We got to the gig late and went to sound check straight away. Wheatus, an 80s band, were on after us and had left strict instructions that we were not to touch any of their stuff.
Our dressing room was an office at the uni for sexual health, Mike found loads of pregnancy tests which proved once again he isn't pregnant.
He also brought the speakers he uses at home, which are from an early 90s personal computer which is odd as Mike never had a personal computer in the 90s.
Then it was time to confuse some students with music and swearing.
We tried not to touch Wheatus' stuff.
And maggot Maggot had a great time.
Mike was peaking 100% by the time we came off stage.
Then it was back to the office to watch Graham take off his clothes and sweat in a corner.
Gig one was done and we headed for Travelodge. We were back on the road!
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